We fly to Tokyo on Aeroflot's flagship flying coffin! Andy is given a seat without a belt, so has to improvise with the belt from his trousers; he also discovers that his sick bag is already full.
We stop off at Moscow, and, at the cafe, are presented with a choice of pizza or Japanese soup. We order pizza. "Pizza's off," the waiter says smugly, "come back next week." When we do come back next week to again order pizza, the same waiter faints, but pizza's still off.
We are greeted at Tokyo airport by the tour manager, who bows in greeting, and Andy extends his hand. Ideally, at this point his trousers should have fallen down, but, still, it's good to be back on the road.

- I can't believe that!
Andy: "It might have been magnetism."
Lester: "No, I think it's more likely that it was purchased by some escaped Panzer mechanics. They must have been disappointed when they got it home."

Talking of which, meine Blumen, on our way to the big temple at Kyoto, we pass by many tourist shops, and, entering one such establishment, I notice a large Ming vase full of flags of various nations. Two of these catch my eagle eye, and I extract both- the first, an old Japanese imperial flag (red sun in corner, with rays extending outwards), the second, a full-blown Nazi flag. Upon asking as to the nation the latter represents, I am informed by the wizened crone behind the bamboo counter:
"That German flag. You English?", she asks, baring her tooth pleasantly.
"Er, no, Argentinian," I reply, hastily exiting before she asks to see my bolas. Or orders more flags.

When we finally arrive at the temple, we find a quaint little bar, no doubt run by the monks, serving ice-cold beer. As we wait for the drinks, our clothes wringing wet in the tropical heat and humidity, we nevertheless appreciate the delightful view over the gorge. New technology and huge insects, the exact opposite of England. Orson's eyes glaze over, and he starts to mutter something about opening a pub in Notre Dame cathedral.
"Warm beer for Jesus!" he cries deliriously. "Qu'est-ce que vous prendrez, votre Eminence?"